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Hi everyone my name is Niraj and I am so excited to be writing for Rebecca’s blog today! To say a bit about myself, I graduated from Warwick University this year, having studied MORSE (Mathematics, Operational Research, Statistics and Economics). I have just started a graduate scheme at an actuarial consultancy. Post-graduate life can be tough, whether you enjoyed your time at university or not. This blog post talks about some of the most challenging things about post-graduate life, and I will also try and give some tips on how you can go about overcoming these challenges.
Maintaining friendships
At university, when you made friends it was often pretty easy to maintain them, as you were fairly nearby to your university friends, and therefore it wasn’t too hard arranging fun things to do with them. However, I found that it was quite hard to maintain all of my university friendships after graduation, and this was for two main reasons. Firstly, a good number of my university friends don’t live near me, so even if there was no pandemic, it would still require effort to arrange a face to face catch up. I live in London, but I have friends that live in places such as Norwich, Birmingham, and Wales. I also have university friends that don’t live in the UK! The second reason is that we are all busy with full-time jobs, as well as other responsibilities. Therefore, any catch-up, whether it is over a video call or face to face would have to be planned around that, and this has proved tricky in a lot of cases. I actually wrote a separate blog post on the challenge of maintaining friendships, which can be found here.
It is hard not to be able to see and interact with your university friends as much as you used to, and it’s perfectly ok to feel sad about this. However, one tip I would give that helped me is to plan and schedule catch-ups in advance, rather than rely on spontaneous plans. As I currently work a full-time job, I tend to use the weekdays to schedule weekend plans with friends. Having advance notice of when I am meeting or even video calling friends allows me to plan things around that.
Adapting to a different lifestyle
I feel that the lifestyle at university is very specific and unique to university life and that things do change after graduation. For a lot of students that I know, this change has proved tricky. Some have felt a loss of freedom and independence by going back to their family home. Others thrived with having a daily routine at university, and now they are struggling to deal with the lack of routine after graduation. I appreciate that every university student has had their own experience when it has come to leaving the university lifestyle and adapting to a new one. Personally, I have found this to be the hardest part of leaving university, and something that was a shock to the system after 4 years at university.
The best piece of advice I would give here is to use this change as an opportunity to do things you wouldn’t have done at university. I do understand that this is easier said than done, however, it is not impossible. When I finished university, I met up with school friends, started blogging again, and started reading. All of these are fun but things I didn’t really have time to do at university. I also started my new job which I really enjoy. Reframing your mind to think about the opportunities that come with the post-university lifestyle helps you with having a positive mindset, which is great for wellbeing.
Comparing yourself with others – This is a big one. It’s very easy for me to say how you shouldn’t compare yourself with others. However, with technology and social media being a massive part of our lives, most of us inevitably fall into the comparison trap. Comparison with others is a particularly big issue after graduation. You may be struggling to find a job, and then reading posts on LinkedIn or Facebook about your friends getting their dream jobs can make you feel down. This is because you can end up comparing yourself to your friends that have jobs, and feel behind as a result. You are all amazing people in your own unique way, and sometimes social media and comparison can make it hard to recognise this. Furthermore, comparing yourself to others can be detrimental to your mental health and wellbeing.
In terms of advice, I am not going to say that you shouldn’t compare yourself to others, as this is easier said than done, and even I do it from time to time. However, what I would say is the things that people tell you or share on social media is never the full story. People generally only share the good things that have happened in their lives, but everyone is fighting a battle you don’t know about. Therefore, even the people that seem to have it all figured out will have things that are not so good in their lives.
I hope this blog post helps and that you are all keeping well. Post-graduation can be a tough time, and it is so important to prioritise your mental health and wellbeing. Remember that there is support out there, and I am always happy to talk to you on nirajshah2003@gmail if you feel that you are struggling.
Read more of Niraj's posts: https://niraj.home.blog/
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